I must be the only human being in the world who doesn’t have a tattoo.
I don’t have a problem with them … well, much of a problem. I’m sorry, but for the first 40 years of my life the only people who got tattoos were criminals or sailors. So for me, the tattoo has a kind of negative vibe.
Now, tattoos are mainstream. Just about everybody has one. I wouldn’t be surprised if the president has a tattoo.
I would look stupid with a tattoo. I’m too old for that kind of thing. And whatever pattern I got would look awful after a couple of years, what with my accelerating weight gain. The state of Florida, for instance, would become the entire North American continent on my flesh, especially if it were tattooed on my waistline.
Besides, I might get a flawed tattoo, maybe one with a misspelling, like this chick: